How to be Socially Awkward.

 How to be Socially Awkward in five easy steps with examples, pictures, and gifs.

   tumblr_mnpo2aY0qN1so21o3o1_500

1. Look painfully self-conscious and/or dress like you don’t care.

            10409778_10201470928249938_110768951686265976_n

a) Posture

You do not know what to do with your hands. Ever. Stand and sit rigidly and when you move, do so in a way that screams, “NOBODY LOOK AT ME!!” but that also makes everyone look at you.

S4_Buster_(01)

b) Appearance

Wear nerdy cloths. Preferably a Doctor Who tee-shirt, faded jeans that are baggy and several inches too short.  Steel-rimmed glasses and white sneakers are a must. Braces are a bonus. Wear your hair in a pony tail or two stiff braids. Or better yet, let the bushy frizz win and do nothing with your hair. Or wear whatever the heck you want. As long as it looks hideous and doesn’t match or follow social norms, you’re good to go.

tumblr_mtkgzmhj2U1rhbv63o1_500

2. Be really random and have lots of “accidents” which you hope no one saw. 

    JekkZZZ

a) do stupid things

Such as talk to yourself or inanimate objects when no one is around.

giphy (1)

Join random social-suicide clubs

tumblr_lbhis1MmAO1qarvi2o1_500

Break dance

tumblr_n43hg4uLYN1toai61o1_400

c) Be spastic and clumsy

Walk in to glass doors

tumblr_lezy2ktJUW1qa88xro1_500

Fall when everyone is watching.

37b1b63542dc4e1e_lawrence_trip_2.xxxlarge

Then make a distasteful joke about it.

1jennifer-lawrence-oscars-gifs-1

c) Be super random and non-conventional

Say random things

f7b2d-mandy

Do random things.

48028-Little-Mermaid-awkward-gif-YdSt

 3. Make conversation as painful as possible

good-morning-starshine-the-earth-says-hello_1521

a) panic and blank when the pressure is on, and thus say the first thing that comes to mind

Develop a stutter or pronounce particular words in non-conventional ways.

Ask awkwardly personal questions or provide TMI during random silences.

JLaw32

b) you simply have no idea as to what constitutes a socially acceptable thing to say. 

Implement unnecessarily archaic vocabulary.

 Be very, painfully frank and honest about everything.

Luna_Lovegood_on_her_homemade_Lionhead_hat

Be completely culturally inept.

Say things which are extremely politically incorrect

5b7e2b56c84811e29e6f22000a9e2992_7

4. Make people feel as uncomfortable as is physically possible when you are nearby.

tumblr_ma9tvcxw4j1rbs18co1_400

 Pull out your cell phone when someone starts talking to you.

Generally ignore people to avoid talking.

Make outrageous demands and hold your ground.

     7f926656452b13c6fde87bbd73481ac7

Accidentally catch someone’s eye, then stare at them for five minutes, blinking occasionally.

1176842582_1393924377

Cry or get unreasonably defensive when someone asks you a question.

               napoleon-dynamite-gif-whatever-i-feel-like-i-wanna-do-gosh

Invade personal space

tumblr_mgrdryrCh01qa1id2o3_r1_250

Poke people

Try to be cool but fail miserably

      i-request-the-highest-of-fives_672

 5. Create a mental state which fluctuates between…

tumblr_m5u2gne37e1r3xuvro1_r2_500

a) having a mental panic attack

 Everyone is staring at me O.o

 Someone asks question *instantly forgets all words*

tumblr_mbwhsaX02H1qc0a0j

 b) to wallowing in self-pity

Everyone hates me.

giphy

c) to not giving a damn.

I hate everyone.

tumblr_mq4vdtFkTL1sat62yo1_500

I never want to see another human being again.

3a3c464b51286196f88580281907431b

I will never go outside again.

Do-All-The-Socially-Awkward-Things-

d) And finally you come to a resigned acceptance of your impediment.

bnes

Congratulations! You now know how to be socially awkward.

kipnapoleondyn123

Now your life is over.

destroyed

Sorry not sorry for the language and sarcasm.

tumblr_mxykjlTu7P1r6f3q7o5_250

have a good day!

Advertisements

One thought on “How to be Socially Awkward.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s